Sunday, June 23, 2013

Saturday, June 22, 2013

I See a Dragon

photo of Twin Rocks in Rockaway Beach, Oregon by Nancy Zavada

As we strolled the beach, my good friend Colleen, told me Twin Rocks looks like a dragon or a sea monster.  With it's head in the water, neck arched and serpent hump following along, the creature heads south down the Pacific Coast just beyond the breakers.

Now I see the dragon each and every time walk along the shore and the two rocks have ceased to exist.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

I Remember You

This was my first Father's Day without my father.  He was in my thoughts all day as he often is, but it was more poignant on this special day.  I wanted to talk about him, to reminisce about his life, to keep him alive through stories and anecdotes with anyone who would listen.  No one was listening.

At a family gathering, no one mentioned him or how my sister and I might be feeling.  It was too uncomfortable for them.   It was as if they didn't ask, they wouldn't hurt us, see our pain or deal with the real grieving which continues.  Friends and family sidestepped the vulnerability and intimacy instead of risk being drawn into it.

I understand it is hard to watch someone grieve, really I do.  For me, it is harder still to just ignore the person who was a huge part of our lives and is no longer present.  What a lose his physical being and all of the memories of him at the same time. 

In our culture, once the memorial service is over, we shut down to avoid the pain.  This phenomenon always seemed strange to me.  Instead of keeping them alive through our memories, we don't talk about them hoping to stop the emotions and ease the pain it might cause in loved ones.

So right here, right now, I am asking those in my life not to spare me.   Please,  please let's talk about all of the people so near and dear to us that have passed on.  If there are tears, laughter, sorrow, anger or joy, let's experience the full range of those emotions together and grow closer through the experience.

At the end of the day, my sweet husband and I sat alone on the porch.  He offered up a toast to Joe and Dick, the fathers who we deeply missed on Father's Day.  We shared memories, laughed and cried for their lives really did matter.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

That is One Dandy Lion

photo of a dandelion by Nancy Zavada

When I was little, I would carefully pick a dandelion as to not knock off any of the "wishes."  Then I would concentrate on a truly spectacular wish and blow, blow, blow until all the wishes were airborne.  I was very confident this ritual worked and still am.

Lucky for me I have a whole yard full of dandelions and can wish away whenever I want!

Friday, June 7, 2013

One Too Many Vampire Movies

The group of preteen girls huddled together pointing at the cormorant.  They were so animated and talking excitedly.  Then the tallest one proclaimed with impeccable authority,  "That is a BAT."  They squealed some more and ran off.

Although tempted to follow them and correct their nature studies, I let them enjoy their Twilight fantasies a while longer.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Rose Festival

Everywhere you look in the Pacific Northwest, roses are in bloom. 
Their blooms are so fragrant and graceful...a festival for the senses indeed!

Monday, June 3, 2013

Aging Beautifully

photo of rings of a tree by Nancy Zavada

When I grow older, will the wrinkles in my face tell the story of my life as beautifully as do the rings of this tree ?